Forward

I’m making great progress at physical therapy. But in the last week my right SI joint has flared up again. Amy has been great every step of the way and today we tried both ultrasound heat and massage. It feels pretty good right now.

The hardest part about this phase of my recovery from diastasis symphysis pubis has been patience. Now that I can stand and walk in the house without even a walker, it is hard to remember I’m not ready for anything. I learned that lesson yesterday as we left the house for the day.

I really want to see the University’s volleyball match on Saturday. It’s the No. 4 team in the country vs. our team, ranked No. 3. The plan was to see if I could get the Little Guy down the curb and into his seat by myself and then practice driving. I was pumped. This would be a chance to see if I could do it.

I picked him up as he stood on the floor, carried him out the door and down the curb without incident. It took me about twice as long as it would have taken my husband, but it didn’t hurt and I felt steady. I put him in the car-seat and started working to buckle him. Soon it was clear that this wasn’t going to work. Bending over the seat was too much. My back was screaming at me.

“I need help,” I told my husband. I told him three times before he got out of the car. It was frustrating for both of us. He knew I wanted to be able to do it. He was trying to give me time to try harder. But I gave it all I had and couldn’t do it. We had a good cry (well, he didn’t cry, but I knew he felt the same as I did) and decided to move forward.

I would climb the stairs rather than practice driving this week. So, on Wednesday night, when it was time for bed, I just did it. Right foot up, then left to the same stair. Left foot up, then right. And I was there before I knew it, at the top of the stairs. For the first time in our new apartment.

Was an incredible feeling. Steps without pain hasn’t happened since January. Steps without discomfort was probably early December last year. Now, I can go everywhere in our house. I can take a shower. A real live, honest-to-goodness shower. No more camping baths in the house for this girl!

Contrasting these two incidents made me think of my country’s recent presidential election. President Obama’s slogan was “Forward.” It resonated with me because I share many of his principles about American being about an equal shot for everyone, no matter where they start on the field. But “Forward” is not the same as easy. It means taking it slow, working it out, even going back to the wheelchair for a day when you need to rest. But forward means momentum and progress. And that is something to smile about.

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