Spent

Students returned to campus today. It’s very exciting day, full of energy and promise for the year and the future of the students who have come to spread their wings and become themselves. I was able to tell a bit of the story this morning. On our lunch break, my husband and I picked out … Continue reading →

Bring the heat

The closer I get to surgery the harder it seems to be to push through the pain. I have no idea what the psychology is behind that. It feels opposite of running a race. When I hit the 10-mile mark of my half-marathon in May 2011 it was as though I’d been given some kind … Continue reading →

Pain vs. adrenaline

When people ask me if the effects of my diastasis symphysis pubis hurt more than labor the answer is obvious. YES. To me, labor didn’t hurt until I felt that awful tearing burning sensation that was my pelvis separating. Up to that point labor didn’t hurt even the way breaking my nose hurt. It was … Continue reading →

Brace and wait

Wear a brace and wait. Until last month, that was my entire treatment plan. The brace should push everything back together, I was told, and as my hormones (Relaxin) returned to normal the pain should cease. In most cases this is true. I’m not most people. (And neither are the approximately 100 women around the … Continue reading →

Only 10 more nights

I have to go to sleep 10 times before I can wake up and check in for surgery. I guess because we have to be there so early in the morning, counting nights seems more accurate. We are preparing for surgery the best we can. I’ve stopped taking my micro birth control pill because The … Continue reading →

Always a balance

Today’s lesson: When things are out of balance, they right themselves. I learned today that there is a chance I will have to take some time off without pay. It got my mind racing about how we’re going to keep all of our financial balls in the air throughout this stretch. Like most, we have … Continue reading →

I’m learning

I am learning that it is OK to ask for help. A lot of help and help for a lot of stuff. Today, one of my co-workers got my lunch out of the microwave. I was worried I may drop it en route to my desk because of the walker. She helped willingly and gave … Continue reading →

New wheels?

We learned our lesson yesterday and when we got to the hospital today Jeremy got me a wheelchair. It was HUGE for me — like the one I used at the airport last week. I know the standard lend-a-chair needs to be one-size-fits-all, but it made it difficult for me to push the wheels. My … Continue reading →

My biggest fear

Having to stay home from dinner last night was very hard on me. I felt like my biggest fear was coming true. (I woke up to pump breast milk and had to get this out.) My biggest fear of parenthood was planted in my brain almost 20 years ago: Not being able to be the … Continue reading →

Is it a lie if

Is it a life if you say you are OK when someone who loves you asks and you know there is nothing they could do to make you better? I don’t think so. But I apologized to my father-in-law for telling the lie anyway. We spent the day at an Omaha hospital, visiting my husband’s … Continue reading →